We realize that this post should really should be on our sister site, because we had to move our Bad Movie Night to Thursday this week, but we don’t actually know them and weren’t sure how to reach out to them to ask 🤣 🤷♂️
Date watched: 5/20/21
Starring: Steve Guttenberg, Nia Peeples, Patrick Renna
Plot: Volcanic eruptions in Los Angeles unleash a swarm of gigantic, lava-breathing tarantulas. (From IMDB)
Quotes:
- I need you to pack everything that’s important to us. I want you to take the dog, I want you take your jewelry, and I want you to pack everything up, and you have to listen to me, and we have to leave here. — Colton, we don’t have a dog.
- No fare, no ride.
- I didn’t save anybody. We still got act two and act three to go.
- You feel safe? — Not even a little bit. No. — You got a plan? — Uh, run. — Run! Run! Run!
- I work here in the museum. — What are you still doing here? — I’m a scientist. For good or bad, these are the kind of moments that we live for.
- The volcanoes and the spiders are one. The Mayans had a term for it, lavalantula. And right here… this would be the queen’s chamber. If you kill the Mamalantula, you kill them all.
- Clever girl.
- Why do you have a military truck? — You know your mom. She likes everything big. — Yes, I do.
- If this map is accurate, and it is…
- Ladies and gentlemen, tonight I call upon you, the good people of the motion picture industry. It is you who works tirelessly 12, 14, 16 hours a day… giving pints and pints of your blood for our great nation. Yes, some might say it’s just entertainment, but we know better. Our movies are where the hopes and dreams of this great nation are born. Ladies and gentlemen, I’m chagrined to say that tonight might be our last production, but I beseech you, please think another way. Tonight is our opening night. Tonight is the night that we save our city, our homes, our families, that we believe in a tomorrow, a tomorrow where the Lakers have another threepeat. — What about the Clippers? — Clippers, too. A tomorrow where the Kings sip again from the Stanley Cup. — What about the Ducks? — The Ducks, too. And a tomorrow where the Dodgers, only the Dodgers, win the World Series. Ladies and gentlemen, tonight I ask you to unify as a city, above the line, below the line. Tonight we draw the line. This is your city. This is my city. I was born in this city. I’m gonna die in this city, but not tonight! Viva Los Angelenos!
Viewer Quotes:
- RIP Hot Coco
- “Uh, you know how we always say that making a film is like war? — Yeah. — Well, let’s hope that this war is like making a film. — What does that mean? — Means I need you to plant those bombs. — Okay, but what does that mean? — Means I need you to plant those bombs. — Where are you going? What are you doing? Colton!” — Just fold in the cheese
Things we learned:
- Never live in LA
- In real life, LA has just as many fires but the spiders aren’t as big
Rule 34 Titles:
- Red Rocket
- Labialantula
- Lavalabia
Final Take:
