Date watched: 10/28/20
Starring: Jackie Cruz, Michael Gross, Jon Heder
Plot: Graboids are illegally taken to a new island resort by a rich playboy as a dangerous form of trophy hunting, and Burt Gummer steps up to save the day. (From IMDB)
Quotes:
- Okay, I’m gonna start leading by example and run. I suggest you do the same!
- Travis is in a Mexican jail. Don’t ask. Long story.
- Before you begin your Graboid-slaying quest, do yourself a favor and get something bigger than that 308. That’s like spitting at Godzilla.
- Well, why didn’t he come after you? You’re obviously the alpha. — She’s culling the weakest from the herd first. — Oh, crap. That means I’m next.
- The underbelly is what you want. Legs, feet, groin, all the soft stuff. — Go for the groin. Got it. Let’s go medieval on these ugly slime bags. — I thought we were going Rambo. — Oh, uh… You go Rambo. I’ve got the chainsaw. I’m going Evil Dead.
- Who needs guns when you got Pennsylvania steel?
- Destiny’s a bitch.
- We draw her to the edge of the cliff and over. — And then we lunge out of the way at the last second? — Something like that.
- “Vaya con diablo, mija.” ~~ “Go with the devil my daughter”
Viewer Quotes:
- Parkour!
- Clever Girl (x2, at the same time)
- “You see this whiskey? It’s a 50-year-old Balvenie. It costs 50 grand a bottle. […] — To me, it’s just whiskey.” — Now I ain’t never hit a lady….
- I mean if you’re going to shit yourself at least you are already in a bathroom
- Muzzle discipline is non-existent on Shrieker Island
- Why did they bring ballistas when they have all the guns in the world? I mean why? And they know they’re underground?
- Get that bitch some tea and dynamite, bitches love tea and dynamite
- Also I’m never choosing the chainsaw over a flamethrower, one of them is ranged… — We were just saying the same thing
Things we learned:
- This was a surprisingly good movie.
- Stop copying the jurassic park cookie-cutter “we are going to bring back dinosaurs but make them more dangerous”
- Jurassic park must have stolen some things from Tremors (’93 vs ’90)
- The original ones had more “real” graphics while later ones went with more CGI
Final Take:
Burt Gummer isn’t dead until I see the body — I need the long-form death certificate…